After surviving child sex abuse, woman hopes to spark more conversations within PA church

Woman opens up about child sex abuse, hopes to spark more conversations within PA church

CUMBERLAND COUNTY, Pa. (WHP) — Between the ages of 5 and 11, Amara Miller was sexually abused by several of her cousins who belonged to the same church she did, according to Miller.

Miller’s family was part of a faith-healing church in Mechanicsburg called Faith Tabernacle Congregation. She said the church pressures its members not to talk about things like sexual abuse, and other people who have left the church have called it a "cult."

I think it comes from years and years and years and years before me, and even years and years and years before them,” Miller said. “I think it's been something that's been hidden.

And then when things were talked about, it was a sin and that's just like, that's what is drilled into your head that even if something wrong is happening to you, you're sinning.

READ MORE | Former 'cult' members call for Pennsylvania church to be shut down, investigated

Because of that, she said, it took many years before she told her parents about the trauma she’d endured as a child.

“I hold nothing against them,” Miller said of her cousins. “I love them. They're still my family, and we're taught in the Bible to love. So I still love them. And I pray that they found healing from it.”

Miller reached out to CBS 21 after she saw previous coverage with another former Faith Tabernacle member, who shared his story of experiencing sexual abuse.

"There is something particularly devastating about experiencing sexual abuse within a religious community that places such tremendous emphasis on purity, righteousness, and holiness,” Miller wrote in a letter she shared with CBS 21.

She wanted to share her story, too, in hopes of encouraging other survivors to share their stories, and hopefully inspire accountability within the church, she said.

“I'm not claiming that it is the whole church, but I know it can still be going on in a church that doesn't talk about those things,” Miller said. “And if it happened to me, I can only imagine who else it's happening to.

“So, I wanted to speak out about it because I just wanted others to feel the safety and know that they can speak out and know that it's wrong and that a church does not get to decide or control that narrative of what's going on, some sort of abuse to a child.”

PREVIOUS COVERAGE | When religion leads to child deaths: Prosecutors set sights on faith-healing church

Miller was the first in her immediate family—including four other siblings and her parents—to leave Faith Tabernacle at 18 years old.

She joined the Marine Corps, which she said church members urged her not to do. Miller said she was instead told to focus on becoming a mother.

But she followed her heart and pursued military service, and once she left the church, she stopped hearing from close friends and extended family, she said.

“I had some really close friends and cousins that I just no longer, we just don't speak anymore, but that's okay,” Miller said. “I just hope and pray for the best for them. And that hopefully they maybe hear or see these interviews and these talks that we're all having, and it kind of opens their eyes a little bit.

In the following months and years, Miller would meet her now-husband and serve roughly five years in North Carolina.

But immediately after leaving the church, Miller said she lost her way from God.

“Probably the first 2 or 3 years after leaving the church, I didn't even know what a relationship with Christ looked like,” Miller said, “and I honestly didn't really care for a time because there was so much hurt behind it.”

But a friend she made in North Carolina took her to a different church, and that’s when things started to make sense.

Now, she said her relationship with God is stronger than ever before.

“I would say my love for Christ has only blossomed,” she said. “It showed me that having a relationship with Christ is above all else, above all the rules all the regulations.”

Now back in Mechanicsburg, Miller said it’s taken years of therapy to heal from many of her experiences and teachings of Faith Tabernacle. She now attends services at Celebrations Church in Dillsburg.

Miller said it seems like more people from the younger generations are starting to leave Faith Tabernacle.

When asked what she would tell people still in the church, Miller said:

I think ultimately a church should not define your value in Christ, they should not define your salvation, and I don't want people to be scared to speak up or ask questions.

I want them to know that Jesus calls us to question, and Jesus calls us to seek the truth and to not be afraid, to know Jesus will not be mad at you, It's not a sin, and that it's okay to question the authorities and those presiding over you.

And to speak up when you know in your heart something's wrong because at the end of the day, we want to protect those who cannot protect themselves.

READ MORE TESTIMONIES FROM FORMER MEMBERS | Fear to freedom: Family urges others to leave faith-healing PA church they now call a cult

CBS 21 spoke on the phone Friday with Faith Tabernacle Pastor Rowland Foster, who said he's not aware of instances of child sex abuse within church families. He declined to comment further.